Judgments

As I get older I find myself following the path of so many before, becoming more opinionated.  I think it's a natural transition and in truth it just feels comfortable.  However, I am also aware that with strong opinion comes and equally strong backlash of judgments.  Many folks who follow me on FB and other venues will notice my increasingly opinionated posts about religion and christianity in particular.  Yes, I was raised to believe a certain set of mystical facts but I now see the fallacy in those assumptions.  They simply don't work for me anymore.  The explanations are just not satisfying.  It is difficult to let such deeply ingrained beliefs go and I do believe that there is something even deeper within the enculturation process which almost requires us to hold a spiritual belief of some stripe.

In no way is this intended in an arrogant tone, but intellectually I feel that I've grown beyond the need for religion.  We all exist in various stages of development and these are not necessarily correlated within chronology.  While I may personally find a strong tie to a particular religion something of an intellectual weakness, the biggest issue I have with religious adherents is that they frequently fail to question their beliefs.  Perhaps it is all of the scientific training kicking in, but more than one sage human has noted that unexamined life is really not life.  We are a naturally curious species and if we fail to question some of the most basic premises of our existence then we are just existing and not living.

I have many christian friends, spiritual friends, and atheist friends but the ones who I really enjoy are the ones who question.  People who don't constantly ask "why" bore me to tears.  I love having discussions, especially passionate ones, about religion and life.  I want to understand how others construct their reality and conceive of the world in which we live.  And, while it drives me crazy to hear people say that they owe this or that to god, I accept that that is their understanding of things.  There have been any number of folks who have tried to convince me to believe one thing or another over my life, and sometimes I've drunk the KoolAid.  However, I have found that the truest form of character is self-determination.

As a human being, I need to discover myself and my place in this world, and in that discovery I need to be true to my beliefs.  I am letting go of that anger I feel towards christianity.  I try to temper my knowledge of the death and destruction wrought by christians with my experience of compassion and understanding by the same group.  Of course this spectrum of good and evil is not unique to this single type of religious belief, but since it is the one with which I have the most experience it is where I lay the greatest criticism.  I am coming to a fuller understanding of secular humanism and the belief that we need to help each other as people without imposing our beliefs on each other.  I help people because I care, not because I feel compelled to be a better [insert spiritual affiliation].

The problem with my beliefs and my opinions is that I fear others will judge me harshly and publicly.  In this age of public sharing through social media, we can easily come to understand more about our friends and family than we might otherwise know.  The somewhat impersonal nature of the medium coupled with its low cost and easy access can easily make anyone their own Socrates.  We are increasingly open with our feelings and opinions because most folks out there will never bother to read what we write, yet we feel the voyeuristic need to put ourselves out there if for no other reason than to find like-minded folks.  However, this connectivity can have large impacts in our lives and that really is the meat of my thoughts right now.

Future employers, professional colleagues, and other people with sway over our lives can view what we share and make judgments about our "worthiness."  My knee-jerk reaction is to censor what I write or what images I post, and that is the same censorship I rail against as an academic.  My opinions are simply that, mine and they sometimes have little bearing on how I conduct myself professionally or privately.  I like to feel that I can put myself above my opinions to take the high road of life.  This is not to say that I don't really believe what I believe, but that I can accept the fact that we have to work collectively.  We are a social species and when conflict arises we need to move to an intellectual arena rather than an emotional arena to move past blockages.

While emotion does inform us and drive us, we need to focus on intellect to come to logical compromise so that we can proceed.  When we stop and stoop to judgment of others, we have begun to slip down the slope.  This focus on emotion drives more poor decisions, death, and destruction than any natural disaster.  In truth, what we do in our private lives or feel in our hearts and minds should have little bearing on our abilities to perform our jobs or work collectively.  Does it really matter if Bill Clinton had an affair or George Bush did drugs?  Did these personal behavior affect their ability to govern?  I would argue not, and that the real difference between the two is intellect and rationality.  One is an archetype of the intellectual while the other is far from that mark.  However, both men were judged more harshly on their private lives than on their public work.

I feel that in time Clinton will come to be seen in a far more positive light not just for the good things that he did but also for his wisdom in surrounding himself with intelligent support teams.  Bush, on the other hand, will be judged far more harshly as a stupid puppet at the hands of his fathers cronies.  That aside, the biggest problem I have with both presidents is not their public decisions, but the fact that their private lives received so much scrutiny.  Personally, I don't really care what the president does in the bedroom or the bar as long as he runs the country well.

To return to religion and judgement (and politics) I think that too many people bring their religion into the voting booth.  We are a secular society and when you vote based on your religious beliefs, you are forcing others to live by those rules.  Again, I see this as a gross lack of intellect as well as compassion.  I vote for things that I believe are the best for the individual and for the country.  I try my best to vote for individual liberty and freedom of choice, but only because I believe we should all be able to choose to live the best life we can.  When you impose your religion on me through the electoral process, I am no longer a free person.  You impinge my personal liberty and my ability to make my own choices.  While I do not believe that abortion is the answer, I believe that the individual must make the decision not the majority.  If you don't believe in abortion then don't have one.  I know that is overly cliche' but it is at the heart of the matter.

My greatest wish in life is that we could all be free to believe and live as we choose, and I would hope that my friends would accept that and choose accordingly.  I may not agree with your religious beliefs, but I would not force my beliefs on you the way you force yours on me.  And most importantly, I would not judge you based on your beliefs and opinions.